Well, back to our childbirth preparation!
Physical preparation is very important, but of almost more importance is emotional and spiritual preparation. The first question to ask yourself is, "What am I afraid of?" because fear always slows down labor. My wonderful midwife, Gretchen, asked me that with every baby from number 6 on and I didn't do anything about it until number 10. When I realized that it was simply the fear of labor that made it take so long, I wondered at how silly I could be! However, being afraid of labor is common - it is what makes so many women insist on epidurals and c-sections - and it is reasonable. It is hard and it is the reason that so many women in tribal cultures bring their babies out for the first time to a warrior's welcome! You are a warrior because you have really faced your fears and death just the way a warrior does in battle. So, how do you deal with that fear?
The first thing I did was search for scriptures to meditate on whenever I got afraid, even months in advance. You need to find ones that work for you. My pastor's wife has been focusing on God's characteristics of love and strength. I focused on fear and surrender to God. Here are mine.
"For He has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind." I Timothy 1:7
"Present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service." Romans 12:1
"Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you are bought with a price; therefore, glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God's." I Corinthians 6:19-20
I meditated on these before the labor and during the labor, to keep my mind on the Lord and what He would enable me to do.
The emotional component is partially the spiritual and partially how you relate to the people around you while you are in labor.
There is a very famous midwifery book entitled, Spiritual Midwifery, which midwife Gretchen, who lived on a commune with her family, called hippy-dippy-trippy, but recommended, anyway. What Ina May Gaskin repeated in many ways was, this labor is not about you. Yes, you are the center of it, but you and those around you and the baby are all involved and you will all be happier if you are focused on them, and not what is going on in your body, no matter how difficult it is at the time. Sound difficult? Maybe, but if you go in with the plan of loving those around you and being focused outside of yourself, the labor will be easier. I speak from 10 babies of experience.
My habit in labor has always been to curl up, scrunch up my eyes, grit my teeth, tell everybody to shut up (pardon me) and soldier through each contraction. I wanted to have Anna, #7, in the bathtub, but that habit kept putting my face under water, which was very threatening to life! My last contraction with Noah, just before I started to push, I finally opened my eyes and looked at Steve and it was like a switch turned! At the time, I thought Noah would be the last, so I was irked with myself for waiting for my last transition contraction ever to learn to open my eyes and look outside of myself! Little did I know, I would get another chance with Timothy. So, I determined this time, to keep my eyes open!
I labored most of the night alone, getting up around 2 a.m. to watch a goofy romantic comedy, walking all the while. At 4 a.m., I went to bed and I didn't really doze much because labor was getting harder. While I labored, I would pray my scriptures and tell the baby I loved him. That was something I had determined ahead of time to do because, in the past, I didn't really care when the midwives told me I would soon have a baby - I just wanted the labor to be over! So, I told the baby I loved him. I told God I loved Him. I told Steve, lying there asleep next to me, that I loved him. I reached an arm up to heaven, praying, looking out the dark window. By 6 a.m., I was starting to get mad that Steve was asleep. So, I woke him up. I didn't really need him to be there, but I didn't want him to be asleep! So, he worked in his office for awhile, and the children started to get up. Big sisters were told to help littles get their breakfast. Around 9 a.m., I told Steve that we should help the labor along. We got in the bathtub and he stimulated my nipples to encourage labor. (Sorry about the graphic! No other way to say it). It was remarkable. I had never actually felt my cervix opening before. Pressure, yes, opening, no. So, after a while we got out of the tub. I would ask Steve to look me in the eyes when I had a contraction. "Give me your eyes!" is what I would say. I told him I loved him and he reciprocated. Eventually, I told him it was time to call Lindsey. My daughters, Sarah, 15, and Abri, 13, were helping now. When Steve was giving my back counter pressure, I asked Abri to "give me her eyes." Her eyes flicked one way and then the other. She didn't know what to do! But, those moments while she was trying to figure out what to look at were harder than others. Anyway, Lindsey arrives, we work our way back to my room, she checks my dilation and, wonder of wonders! I am 9 centimeters! I was so thrilled that I was already there that I remembered what our Home First (Chicago) doctor Rosi had told us: laughter helps labor! So, I started laughing, even forcing the laughter to help out, but still, in transition and laughing! I didn't break down in transition, the way I have with every other labor for 30 years; I was happy! I laid down on my side on the bed with Sarah in front of my holding my hand, Abri behind me, pushing my back, Anna and A.J. on the far side of the bed, watching from afar, and Steve, ready to catch the baby, with Lindsey's help. Mimi had gone with Mutti (Grandma) to bring home a Corgi puppy and Mick (19) was in the dining room playing Nerf gun wars with Noah (3). I pushed out a bubble of amniotic sack in front of Timmy's head, the sack burst and he and the sack came out together.
There is my birth story. Keeping my focus off myself and on those around me and knowing that I was where I was because God had called me to it changed my birth experience after so many babies. As our old (in every way!) pastor, Dale Linebaugh said: "God's calling is God's enabling." You can do this because God has brought you to it. You can do this because you are loved and loving. You can do this because He will help you. You do not have to be afraid because He is stronger than you are and would never ask you to do something He wouldn't help you do.
Saturday, December 14, 2013
Friday, October 4, 2013
Emotional Benefits of Time in Nature
Have you ever noticed that when a child gets unhappy, he seeks out nature?
Nature offers this in a way that video games and even books cannot. They can offer escape, but they do not offer healing.
How many ways does nature offer healing? My oldest son, Ben, who is not a nature person, and I have come up with an expression: taking a cat break. When things are just too noisy or we are feeling overwhelmed, we go outside and stroke a cat. Ten minutes of that has been proven to bring down the heart rate and blood pressure. That is the purpose behind therapy animals in nursing homes.
Another child,Becki, is not a particularly nature-oriented person, but she has extreme emotions. She has identified herself as ADHD, since coffee makes her fall asleep. At any rate, when she gets very wound up, she leaves the house and goes for a walk. One night when she was sixteen, she got very rebellious and got into a fight, first with me and then with her dad. Dad had to lock her out of the house. (Kevin Lehman recommends this, so you know.) It was dark at that time and after we had all calmed down, I asked Steve, "Where's Becki?" We thought perhaps she had snuck in through her grandparents door. No sign of her. The whole family got involved in the search. We never did find her because she had fallen asleep in the hay barn and didn't hear us calling. But she was happy when she came back in!
I can name an instance with almost every child where he or she has sought out the solace of nature, whether taking a walk, climbing a tree, or petting an animal, or something else.
Not only does nature heal, it challenges us. By giving a child to take a risk, whether holding the snake at the nature center or backcountry hiking, the opportunity to face danger and come out on top or perhaps even fail and find a new way or new challenge affects who that child will become. It prepares him for emotional and career risks in his or her future. After all, if I can hold that snake, I can take that test, I can make that call, I can commit to marry that person.
When I was a child, I hiked on Isle Royale National Park with my parents. (It's pretty much the only National Park in the Midwest, so it is my dad's favorite.) The next year, they hiked the Minong Trail, a very difficult trail, and I wanted to know if I could go along. They said, no, this was for grownups. So, I got this idea in my head that when you were a grownup, you hiked the length of Isle Royale. In 2011, at the age of 46, I, my father, my 18 year old son, Mick, and my 12 year old daughter, Abri, hiked the Greenstone Ridge Trail, a total of about 47 miles. When we left on the seaplane, I looked back over the length of the island and realized that, even from the air, I could not see where we had started - it was that far away. I began to cry. I made it! I was a grown-up! If that accomplishment meant that much to me, a mature adult, what could it mean to my son and daughter? I am so proud of them (even though they left Grandpa and me in the dust). I know that they will do great things because they have tackled such a huge endeavor, faced danger in the wilderness, and completed what they set out to do. Holding that snake in the nature center is just the first step!
Nature offers this in a way that video games and even books cannot. They can offer escape, but they do not offer healing.
How many ways does nature offer healing? My oldest son, Ben, who is not a nature person, and I have come up with an expression: taking a cat break. When things are just too noisy or we are feeling overwhelmed, we go outside and stroke a cat. Ten minutes of that has been proven to bring down the heart rate and blood pressure. That is the purpose behind therapy animals in nursing homes.
Another child,Becki, is not a particularly nature-oriented person, but she has extreme emotions. She has identified herself as ADHD, since coffee makes her fall asleep. At any rate, when she gets very wound up, she leaves the house and goes for a walk. One night when she was sixteen, she got very rebellious and got into a fight, first with me and then with her dad. Dad had to lock her out of the house. (Kevin Lehman recommends this, so you know.) It was dark at that time and after we had all calmed down, I asked Steve, "Where's Becki?" We thought perhaps she had snuck in through her grandparents door. No sign of her. The whole family got involved in the search. We never did find her because she had fallen asleep in the hay barn and didn't hear us calling. But she was happy when she came back in!
I can name an instance with almost every child where he or she has sought out the solace of nature, whether taking a walk, climbing a tree, or petting an animal, or something else.
Not only does nature heal, it challenges us. By giving a child to take a risk, whether holding the snake at the nature center or backcountry hiking, the opportunity to face danger and come out on top or perhaps even fail and find a new way or new challenge affects who that child will become. It prepares him for emotional and career risks in his or her future. After all, if I can hold that snake, I can take that test, I can make that call, I can commit to marry that person.
When I was a child, I hiked on Isle Royale National Park with my parents. (It's pretty much the only National Park in the Midwest, so it is my dad's favorite.) The next year, they hiked the Minong Trail, a very difficult trail, and I wanted to know if I could go along. They said, no, this was for grownups. So, I got this idea in my head that when you were a grownup, you hiked the length of Isle Royale. In 2011, at the age of 46, I, my father, my 18 year old son, Mick, and my 12 year old daughter, Abri, hiked the Greenstone Ridge Trail, a total of about 47 miles. When we left on the seaplane, I looked back over the length of the island and realized that, even from the air, I could not see where we had started - it was that far away. I began to cry. I made it! I was a grown-up! If that accomplishment meant that much to me, a mature adult, what could it mean to my son and daughter? I am so proud of them (even though they left Grandpa and me in the dust). I know that they will do great things because they have tackled such a huge endeavor, faced danger in the wilderness, and completed what they set out to do. Holding that snake in the nature center is just the first step!
Tuesday, October 1, 2013
Physical Benefits of time in Nature
It is up to the parent to expose a child to nature: what you value, they will value.
My daughter, Anna, has experienced the physical benefits of walking in nature. She has a gluten sensitivity that we only became aware of three years ago, so that poor little girl only new a life of fatigue and pain. Fortunately, she was a good reader. Unfortunately, when when she learned to read, she went to bed and didn't come out for two years. As a result, she took on a tremendous amount of weight. After reading Last Child in the Woods while hiking Isle Royale with two of my other kids, I started walking around our property periodically. I took Anna, 8, and A.J., 5, on our little nature trail. Our nature trail goes on switchbacks down into a ravine with a stream, a waterfall, and a natural bridge. A.J. would run up and down the hills regardless of paths and was very comfortable. Anna could barely lift her feet from fear of losing her balance on the uneven surfaces, to say nothing of getting tired quickly. We got her off the gluten (another story) and she, while still being heavy, can now move comfortably on the paths. Starting the habit of hiking young helps you as you grow old, since balance and flexibility are the most important parts of staying active. On Isle Royale, we met a couple who were 75 years of age! They hiked with children and grandchildren all their lives.
My daughter, Anna, has experienced the physical benefits of walking in nature. She has a gluten sensitivity that we only became aware of three years ago, so that poor little girl only new a life of fatigue and pain. Fortunately, she was a good reader. Unfortunately, when when she learned to read, she went to bed and didn't come out for two years. As a result, she took on a tremendous amount of weight. After reading Last Child in the Woods while hiking Isle Royale with two of my other kids, I started walking around our property periodically. I took Anna, 8, and A.J., 5, on our little nature trail. Our nature trail goes on switchbacks down into a ravine with a stream, a waterfall, and a natural bridge. A.J. would run up and down the hills regardless of paths and was very comfortable. Anna could barely lift her feet from fear of losing her balance on the uneven surfaces, to say nothing of getting tired quickly. We got her off the gluten (another story) and she, while still being heavy, can now move comfortably on the paths. Starting the habit of hiking young helps you as you grow old, since balance and flexibility are the most important parts of staying active. On Isle Royale, we met a couple who were 75 years of age! They hiked with children and grandchildren all their lives.
Thursday, September 26, 2013
Nature Helps ADHD
The mental benefits of time out in nature cannot be overstated. I wrote yesterday about how Ansel Adams was kicked out of school at age 7 for hyperactivity and found calm and a career out of doors. We have found that to be true in our family, as well.
One of the most wonderful things about nature is that, unlike electronic media, which is flat, nature is layered. There are layers of awareness in our five senses and if one layer is too much, we have the option of moving into another layer. Think about the layers of the forest. There is the canopy, the heights. Then there is the background - background noise of trees and wind and animals, background greenery, background topography. In the foreground there are the noises of animals just off the path, flowers right there, the rock or stump to step over next. But, if one sits still, there is all of that, plus the very close foreground of moss, bugs and grass. Living in the country, we can experience that exact layering, but living in Chicago we had the same experience at Lincoln Park or on the lakefront of Lake Michigan, as my children had in their backyard in the suburbs.
For ADHD children, who tend to be very self-involved, nature takes a child out of himself. There is so much out there that they can choose to focus on that their self-involvement fades.
We have two children who have been noticeably ADHD. The first child was Mick. We used to joke that he could get distracted in an empty, white room. He would switch from subtraction to addition in the middle of a math problem because he daydreamed his way through it and lost track. We didn't require him to sit on a chair while doing school, but he did have to TOUCH the chair. But, he discovered hunting when he was 14 years old. He learned to sit in the woods for hours. He is now more capable of being still than any person I know.
Miriam was our other ADHD child. She was more of the classic type of hyperactivity combined with impulse control. She was already angry by the time she was four. Then she started ballet and she smiled again. She learned to ride a bike and she was set free. She gets unhappy and can get downright angry when she is confined to a chair. She needs exercise and the best place for her to get it is outdoors. She jumps on the trampoline and rides her bike into town (three miles one way), and goes swimming in the summertime. But, what is the best for her is working with the animals. Whether she is grooming and saddling horses and riding or cleaning the alpaca barn or feeding cats, she is at her most content. Many ADHD kids can feel that they are being yelled at and criticized all the time. The opportunity to work, be productive and contribute, while using their bodies, can add so much to their self-image, which actually falls under the emotional benefits. However, that contentment allows both Mick, who is an honors engineering student at UW Platteville, and Miriam, who is in Algebra at the age of 12, to focus on their studies.
One of the most wonderful things about nature is that, unlike electronic media, which is flat, nature is layered. There are layers of awareness in our five senses and if one layer is too much, we have the option of moving into another layer. Think about the layers of the forest. There is the canopy, the heights. Then there is the background - background noise of trees and wind and animals, background greenery, background topography. In the foreground there are the noises of animals just off the path, flowers right there, the rock or stump to step over next. But, if one sits still, there is all of that, plus the very close foreground of moss, bugs and grass. Living in the country, we can experience that exact layering, but living in Chicago we had the same experience at Lincoln Park or on the lakefront of Lake Michigan, as my children had in their backyard in the suburbs.
For ADHD children, who tend to be very self-involved, nature takes a child out of himself. There is so much out there that they can choose to focus on that their self-involvement fades.
We have two children who have been noticeably ADHD. The first child was Mick. We used to joke that he could get distracted in an empty, white room. He would switch from subtraction to addition in the middle of a math problem because he daydreamed his way through it and lost track. We didn't require him to sit on a chair while doing school, but he did have to TOUCH the chair. But, he discovered hunting when he was 14 years old. He learned to sit in the woods for hours. He is now more capable of being still than any person I know.
Miriam was our other ADHD child. She was more of the classic type of hyperactivity combined with impulse control. She was already angry by the time she was four. Then she started ballet and she smiled again. She learned to ride a bike and she was set free. She gets unhappy and can get downright angry when she is confined to a chair. She needs exercise and the best place for her to get it is outdoors. She jumps on the trampoline and rides her bike into town (three miles one way), and goes swimming in the summertime. But, what is the best for her is working with the animals. Whether she is grooming and saddling horses and riding or cleaning the alpaca barn or feeding cats, she is at her most content. Many ADHD kids can feel that they are being yelled at and criticized all the time. The opportunity to work, be productive and contribute, while using their bodies, can add so much to their self-image, which actually falls under the emotional benefits. However, that contentment allows both Mick, who is an honors engineering student at UW Platteville, and Miriam, who is in Algebra at the age of 12, to focus on their studies.
Wednesday, September 25, 2013
It's Fall! My favorite time of year! I always get motivated in the fall. But what I love most about the fall is the world outside. Nature and all its possibilities surrounds us in the fall with the cooling temperatures and the harvest.
Nature is God's gift to us. Everything that is in this world can be used by and for man, even the things that most of us get annoyed by, like dandelions. Dandelions used to be called the king of herbs - it was eaten! As with many greens, you have to eat them before the flowers show up or they get bitter. But the study of nature in all its facets gives your family so many gifts. Over my next few blogs, I will be expanding on the following subjects:
A boy back at the turn of the 20th century was permanently expelled from school because of his hyperactivity. He was seven. His parents found that he calmed down when they took him out in nature. He found a career in nature photography. His name was Ansel Adams, certainly the only photographer I could name, I don't know about you. Spending time in nature, whether working, walking or watching has proven to be a most effective therapy for ADHD.
Walking in an apple orchard, the state park or the desert - Any walking over uneven surfaces is better physical training in strengthening the core muscles and improving balance than soccer practice.
Picking apples or pumpkins and making apple sauce - Making your own food from produce you have gathered gives us a true appreciation of the gifts God has given us. If you live in the city, buying a few extra quarts of strawberries and making jam will do the same thing.
Taking care of and observing animals - Children learn about stewardship of nature from spending time with pets, going to a zoo, birdwatching, and the like.
Gardening - Whether your family farms, you weed a suburban flower bed, or you are raising radishes in your apartment window, the study of plants in real life aids in the study of biology later, teaches stewardship to children, and gratitude to God.
The weather - Everybody has weather. Even in Los Angeles, you can observe clouds and a homemade barometer works in a high rise apartment. Everybody is subject to the weather and, as the Bible says, "He makes it to rain on the just and the unjust."
The heavens - Whether you can go outside and observe the changing of the moon phases, stars and planets, or if the only star you can see is a satellite looking at you, and you look at celestial bodies via the Internet, God has given them to us for signs and seasons and they unite the earth, because we all have the same stars.
Rocks - What kid doesn't like to collect pretty rocks? But what a story they can tell and what we can't do with them! What a gift from God!
Admiring the sky - No matter where you live, city, suburb or country, everybody has a sky. Lying in my bed on State Street in Chicago, I would sometimes be awakened by the moon! It still happens, though I can only see one yard light from anywhere in my house, now.
Stay tuned as we go through these subjects and you see the benefits of studying nature and how it can help your child, your family and your school.
Nature is God's gift to us. Everything that is in this world can be used by and for man, even the things that most of us get annoyed by, like dandelions. Dandelions used to be called the king of herbs - it was eaten! As with many greens, you have to eat them before the flowers show up or they get bitter. But the study of nature in all its facets gives your family so many gifts. Over my next few blogs, I will be expanding on the following subjects:
A boy back at the turn of the 20th century was permanently expelled from school because of his hyperactivity. He was seven. His parents found that he calmed down when they took him out in nature. He found a career in nature photography. His name was Ansel Adams, certainly the only photographer I could name, I don't know about you. Spending time in nature, whether working, walking or watching has proven to be a most effective therapy for ADHD.
Walking in an apple orchard, the state park or the desert - Any walking over uneven surfaces is better physical training in strengthening the core muscles and improving balance than soccer practice.
Picking apples or pumpkins and making apple sauce - Making your own food from produce you have gathered gives us a true appreciation of the gifts God has given us. If you live in the city, buying a few extra quarts of strawberries and making jam will do the same thing.
Taking care of and observing animals - Children learn about stewardship of nature from spending time with pets, going to a zoo, birdwatching, and the like.
Gardening - Whether your family farms, you weed a suburban flower bed, or you are raising radishes in your apartment window, the study of plants in real life aids in the study of biology later, teaches stewardship to children, and gratitude to God.
The weather - Everybody has weather. Even in Los Angeles, you can observe clouds and a homemade barometer works in a high rise apartment. Everybody is subject to the weather and, as the Bible says, "He makes it to rain on the just and the unjust."
The heavens - Whether you can go outside and observe the changing of the moon phases, stars and planets, or if the only star you can see is a satellite looking at you, and you look at celestial bodies via the Internet, God has given them to us for signs and seasons and they unite the earth, because we all have the same stars.
Rocks - What kid doesn't like to collect pretty rocks? But what a story they can tell and what we can't do with them! What a gift from God!
Admiring the sky - No matter where you live, city, suburb or country, everybody has a sky. Lying in my bed on State Street in Chicago, I would sometimes be awakened by the moon! It still happens, though I can only see one yard light from anywhere in my house, now.
Stay tuned as we go through these subjects and you see the benefits of studying nature and how it can help your child, your family and your school.
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
review of Todd Wilson's How to be a Great Wife (even though you homeschool)
I just went to the Wisconsin CHEA homeschool conference. Got a book by Todd Wilson entitled How to be a Great Wife (Even though you Homeschool) It is a designed to be a 10 week bible study for home schooling moms, including a chapter to read together and discussion questions, plus an action point for each week. The reading was so short and to the point that I did the entire study myself on Sunday evening. I was so inspired to change me to get my husband to be more involved. Since it is written from a man's point of view, we find out exactly how to get our husbands involved, not the manipulative techniques that we, as women, sometimes employ to get what we want.
We want our husbands to take leadership, be attentive and affectionate with the kids and and with us, and help us! But our usual approach is to nag. Todd Wilson suggests we be encouragers the way a mom is with her children - compliment and appreciate the tiniest effort, rather than criticize.
Amazingly, when I made the effort to follow his advice, I found that I was being that way with everyone, even my mother-in-law! I like myself so much more. And I really do see Steve doing things that I hadn't thought of before. It's like the quote from a book I read: Only he who believes sees.
We want our husbands to take leadership, be attentive and affectionate with the kids and and with us, and help us! But our usual approach is to nag. Todd Wilson suggests we be encouragers the way a mom is with her children - compliment and appreciate the tiniest effort, rather than criticize.
Amazingly, when I made the effort to follow his advice, I found that I was being that way with everyone, even my mother-in-law! I like myself so much more. And I really do see Steve doing things that I hadn't thought of before. It's like the quote from a book I read: Only he who believes sees.
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
Preparing for Childbirth, Part I
Timothy Jeremiah was born to this 47 year old mom on January 12. Yay!
What is even more "yay!" is how the birth went. It only took 10 births to figure it out, but I had the best birth experience I'd ever had with him. I will be sharing about the ways that I prepared for his birth. I could not tell you the one thing that did the trick; they may all have worked together. Being pregnant and laboring are not pigeon-holed activities, they are very holistic. I think it all started with my midwife, Lindsey, saying, "You know, you don't have to wait until 7 p.m. to deliver." You see, from baby number 4 to baby number 9, I delivered at between 7 and 9:30 p.m. and I was not looking forward to another 24 hour labor. Lindsey's words made me realize that I do not have to have the kind of labor I had before; I do not have to have the kind of labor that I fear.
Something that I discovered in Tim's labor was that I am usually ready to have the baby hours earlier, but something psychological was causing a conflict in me to where I didn't want to deliver. I fought for hours, even as I was begging my body to deliver and I just couldn't until I reached "safe hour", the hour I felt safe to deliver. All kinds of creatures will not deliver if they are afraid. Alpacas, which we raised, live in the Andes where it freezes every night, even in the height of summer. If they have not delivered by noon, they will stop labor. Our only alpaca births after 1:00 have been dystocias which needed help to be delivered. Since the baby is wet, if it doesn't have time to dry off before the air freezes, it will die. Amish women come from a culture where sex and birth are not discussed in front of the children and most of them have a lot of them. They almost always labor at night and if the baby is not born by the time the sun comes up, they will almost always tell the midwife to go home: the baby is not coming now. Psychologically, because of their culture, they don't feel comfortable having a baby with children running around, so - they don't. I didn't know what made me afraid to deliver until my "safe hour", but there it was: I didn't have babies until I was off the Mommy clock - 7:30, time for kids to be in bed.
That was what started me wearing the maternity belt which made so much of a difference in my level of discomfort and in my continued activity. I did slow down the last month: the weather was getting bad and, I don't care how active you are, nine months is nine months. I did have some scary moments on the ice in December and early January. The point is, wearing the belt got me started with a new approach to being pregnant.
From Childbirth Wisdom, I found that most pregnant women in traditional cultures work very hard. So I made a point of walking 1-3 miles every day or two and to bring up my heavy grain buckets and baskets of laundry myself, instead of asking a teenager to do it. That was my second change in pregnancy approach. I have a friend who is very careful of her diet and runs 5 miles a day, even when she's pregnant and she has a hard time getting to the hospital before the baby is born. The Amish work very hard all the time and are famous for fast, easy labors. Body strength and fitness can't help but prepare you for the heavy physical activity of labor.
What is even more "yay!" is how the birth went. It only took 10 births to figure it out, but I had the best birth experience I'd ever had with him. I will be sharing about the ways that I prepared for his birth. I could not tell you the one thing that did the trick; they may all have worked together. Being pregnant and laboring are not pigeon-holed activities, they are very holistic. I think it all started with my midwife, Lindsey, saying, "You know, you don't have to wait until 7 p.m. to deliver." You see, from baby number 4 to baby number 9, I delivered at between 7 and 9:30 p.m. and I was not looking forward to another 24 hour labor. Lindsey's words made me realize that I do not have to have the kind of labor I had before; I do not have to have the kind of labor that I fear.
Something that I discovered in Tim's labor was that I am usually ready to have the baby hours earlier, but something psychological was causing a conflict in me to where I didn't want to deliver. I fought for hours, even as I was begging my body to deliver and I just couldn't until I reached "safe hour", the hour I felt safe to deliver. All kinds of creatures will not deliver if they are afraid. Alpacas, which we raised, live in the Andes where it freezes every night, even in the height of summer. If they have not delivered by noon, they will stop labor. Our only alpaca births after 1:00 have been dystocias which needed help to be delivered. Since the baby is wet, if it doesn't have time to dry off before the air freezes, it will die. Amish women come from a culture where sex and birth are not discussed in front of the children and most of them have a lot of them. They almost always labor at night and if the baby is not born by the time the sun comes up, they will almost always tell the midwife to go home: the baby is not coming now. Psychologically, because of their culture, they don't feel comfortable having a baby with children running around, so - they don't. I didn't know what made me afraid to deliver until my "safe hour", but there it was: I didn't have babies until I was off the Mommy clock - 7:30, time for kids to be in bed.
That was what started me wearing the maternity belt which made so much of a difference in my level of discomfort and in my continued activity. I did slow down the last month: the weather was getting bad and, I don't care how active you are, nine months is nine months. I did have some scary moments on the ice in December and early January. The point is, wearing the belt got me started with a new approach to being pregnant.
From Childbirth Wisdom, I found that most pregnant women in traditional cultures work very hard. So I made a point of walking 1-3 miles every day or two and to bring up my heavy grain buckets and baskets of laundry myself, instead of asking a teenager to do it. That was my second change in pregnancy approach. I have a friend who is very careful of her diet and runs 5 miles a day, even when she's pregnant and she has a hard time getting to the hospital before the baby is born. The Amish work very hard all the time and are famous for fast, easy labors. Body strength and fitness can't help but prepare you for the heavy physical activity of labor.
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